Monday, January 25, 2016

Simple Elegance

I know this is redundant, and yet it appeals as a name for that part of our lives that in the third stage becomes easier, simpler, and therefore more elegant. I am referring to the way we can make decisions, slick as a whistle, unlike younger people - or ourselves when we were younger. I take that back - in the first stage I certainly made quick decisions often enough, just they were way more likely to be oh-so-wrong! Now, because of simple elegance, my batting average is much improved.

One of the advantages of aging is the quantity (and hopefully the quality) of experience we have in our bag of tricks. If we trust that experience, if we assume we now, at last, know what is best for our own selves, then with simple elegance we choose directions, make decisions, and sort futures that, while we might regret feeling unable to choose otherwise, are unwaffled and rarely revisited.

My younger self always tried to choose wisely, but my bag of tricks was small, and my percentage of mistakes large. I spent my middle years stuffing as many outcomes as I could into that bag, and I am happy lugging it around now.  If you have reached your golden years without a big, fat experience bag, you need to get out more! Just sayin'.

The thing is, without necessarily even being conscious of it, we balance our futures on the backs of our experiences. Simple elegance means that confidence in our own council prevents much of the anxiety we might expect moving forward in the third stage. Simple elegance means acceptance of certain contexts that cannot be changed and the ability to yell "bullshit" at others. It means we can compare our own opinions to the world we inherit and easily choose our own futures.

When I grow old I shall wear purple because I want to. Because it is the right color for me. Because my daughter wants me not to. Whatever your reasons, they are your reasons, earned through legions of circumstances over battalions of year. You get to have them and you get to keep them. And that is simply elegant:)


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